Like writing diary entries and blog entries, creative journalling – an artistic use of a journal – can be a cathartic and personal expression  ( have a look at artist Anahata Kathkin‘s journal section for unique inspiration).

While I enjoy doing this occasionally, I have practiced something unconsciously for many years, my own way of putting into images and words, my own hopes for the future and what I want my life to manifest. I take a pile of magazines of various subjects ( a large stack if I’m feeling particularly energetic ), put on some soothing music, light a soothing candle and start cutting. When I started doing this I did it to cut out things I simply thought were beautiful and inspiring visually; when I was younger and had hopes to become a wedding designer I cut out images that organized my own aesthetic vision. Later, I started ripping out full articles and interviews that in some way spoke to me. I think most of us do this in some form or another. 

Later, I came across an article ( and I’m really hoping I can remember where) that introduced an organized way of giving voice to our wishes. Who we wanted to be authentically. It suggested that you use several folders, each labelled with different headings, to put images and articles in. Some of them were:

- Living / home

- relationship

- personal image/ fashion

- family

- career

- lifestyle/ travel

- wild dreams 

These folders can be your ongoing folders. It is great to write things in a diary, but I find the addition of having these images is a very powerful way to bring clarity to your visions. It’s a way to put yourself in charge of your life, of what you desire and are passionate about. And even though what you see in the magazines is not exactly what you envision for yourself or may be completely unfathomable for your present or future, it doesn’t matter. What is wrong with dreaming grand things? It is often said that the only way that grand ( or gracefully modest things ) can happen is if you give room in your mind for them to happen. 

 

Sometimes I take out my folders and look back at things I cut out before, and while some things I hope for may be still far away, the images reaffirm my sense of my own self, and the comfort in that is worth so much. 

I once met a spiritual councillor who asked me what I was so afraid of. ” I’m afraid of my family not approving”, “I’m ashamed of my spending. I’m scared of being seen as irresponsible and losing respect”.        

He looked unperturbed.       

“What’s the worst thing that could happen?”

“I would be seen as not to be trusted with their money, maybe never again”.

“And so?” He said, still looking calm behind his round glasses.

“I guess…I mean…” I was beginning to run out of things to say. The worst thing that could happen, like shame and guilt was uncomfortable yes, but was it that bad?

“How do you feel right now? What’s happening in your body right now?”

“My throat is tight. I feel knots in my stomach. I have a sinking feeling…I feel energy draining out of my feet”. The councillor gave me these instructions:

“Feel what you are feeling. Can you accept those feelings?”

“Yes”, I replied.

“Ok. Now if you could, could you love those feelings? Just the feelings. Could you love them?”

Pause. “Yes”.

“And if you could, would you let them go?”

“Yes”.

“Are you ready to let go of the feelings right now?”

“Yes I’m ready”.

“Let them go now”.

I breathed out and something shifted. Feeling ever so slightly different, he asked me where the feeling was now, and had anything changed? The sensations were now lower – my throat was more free,  though my stomach still had tension. We went through the exercise again, repeating the questions “what do you feel”, “if you could would you love them”, “if you could would you let them go”. Again, my sensations shifted. My stomach had eased, the nerves were now in my feet, but were dissipating, as if they were releasing into the floor. With his patient guidance, I repeated the exercise five times, and by the end of it, my gut wrenching fear had, if temporarily, subsided. Then he said:

“So what is fear but sensation? Anytime you feel unease, repeat these questions , five times, to yourself.”

It was so simple. The wisdom had been imparted, and I was grateful. What is fear but a sensation? How can you guide yourself to let go of those sensations, and importantly, accept them as they are? 

Hope, thy light; Fear, thy friend and teacher in disguise.